Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
