Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
