In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
