You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
