I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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