So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize