the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Randomize
