may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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