i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
