I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
