He is an equal opportunity slut.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize