Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
