I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
