So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
