What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
