WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
