weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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