I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
