Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Holy sore nipples Batman
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Drunk is not a location!
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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