i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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