I'm really into asian looking animals
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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