Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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