We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Let's get the cat blown out
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize