I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
