Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
