Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
