At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
