hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I think people are normalizing furries
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize