How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
