Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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