Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
