I heard we made out
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
