spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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