is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
