I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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