dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize