he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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