I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
