we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
