I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
