No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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