We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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