It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
