why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
