# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
