I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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