Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I just pynch a tree in the face
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
