last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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