he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Semen is not good for contacts.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
