Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize