If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
